Friday, August 12, 2005

Decision to adopt

I have been praying for the past 2 years about whether or not to start my family through adoption. In January, God made it clear to me that adoption was in my future. I have had an experience with "God's timing" today.

I received a check in the mail yesterday from my house refinance. I had not been expecting this check, so I wanted to pray about what to do with it. I began thanking God for this money and asking Him to show me what to do. Then I would pray for Addie Mei, as I have for the last many months. I do not know who she is yet, but I already love her and pray for her by name. I went back and forth praying between her and the money for 2 hours, then it hit me like a ton of bricks. GET OUT OF BED AND FILL OUT THE APPLICATION!!!!!!!!!!! I had planned on starting the adoption in about three years, but it was clear God was saying to me last night to start NOW.

After filling it all out, I went to bed, now 2am. I still could not sleep, I had than knot in my throat. I finally told God that I did not know what else to pray, so I asked the Holy Spirit to intercede on my behalf. for about 10 minutes, I could not think a thought or say a word, except "Thank You." Over and over I kept repeating it. Finally I could think clearly, then I went to sleep. I got up this morning and went right to the phone to call FTIA, Families Thru International Adoption. I spoke with someone who told me that China was not open to singles adopting. I said OK and almost hung up. I asked her if it mattered if I wanted to adopt a special needs baby, and she said yes and put me through to Maury. Maury told me that if I get my paperwork done soon, I might be able to receive my referrel in October. God works. You see I put on my application last night that I wanted to adopt a special needs little girl.

I sent my application off and will start the home study stuff and paperchase for the dossier next week!!!!!!! God's timing is perfect, I can only pray that He works out all the details as I am not really mentally or financially ready to be a Mama yet.....